Tuesday, 10 June 2014

The 'Ex' Factor

Exes, the majority of us have 'em, but what actually makes an 'ex'? I find  the term ex-boyfriend, ex-girlfriend or even ex-best friend extremely harsh, and very finite. And what criteria goes to make an ex, do you have to have gone out for a certain amount of time? Broke up in a certain way? To me the whole thing is just a riddle.

Then there is the good ex/bad ex scenario. Some people get on extremely well with there exes, and why not? To me it makes perfect sense, if the break-up was mutual, and you still think they are a really great person, then why not make them into a really great friend. But then my mind poses the ultimate question, if you have dated, and potentially loved someone, and then see them every day in your circle of friends, can you truely get over them? The Ted/Robyn scenario (How I Met yYour Mother) springs to mind when I think about this, as does the classic Ross/Rachel relationship (Friends). Even after Ross and Rachel had let the situation lie for some time they still struggled to see each other every day, and to see each other dating other people. I mean look at how Ross's weeding to Emily turned out!!

Then there are the ugly break-ups. I don't know much about these, but the cheating escapades you hear about and see on the likes of "Made in Chelsea" come to mind. I have only ever had one break-up and by extension have only one ex, so I don't know much about the whole break-up and make-up world, it is just something that I can't help pondering. I look at my own break-up (where safe to say I was heartbroken) and think about all the extra circumstances that went along with it, our age, the length of the relationship, my fastly deteriating health, the nature of my ex-boyfriend itself, and I can't help comparing it to other break-ups I know. And to me things don't seem to match up.

What happens if you want to be friends with your ex? And is it healthy to want to be? Can you ever truely revert back to your old relationship, or are you destined to be "Fremenies" for ever? I would love to know your thoughts on this, as I am one confuzzled gal.


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